Proverbs 16:6 ESV
By steadfast love and faithfulness iniquity is atoned for, and by the fear of the Lord one turns away from evil.
[https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=proverbs+16%3A6&version=ESV]
Reconciliation doesn’t come easy. When my brother sins against me, I will struggle with how to handle the problem- where the lines are, what forgiveness means, what it doesn’t mean. When I sin against him, I will struggle the same, just from the other side, and I’ll see his similar struggle. Even the best of intentions seem futile, for the stubborn, and when I try to paper it over, all that happens is a perpetuation of the rift. It seems that wounds can be ignored or noted but never healed, and we hurt. How can we find reconciliation?
First, we must establish what forgiveness is. To forgive a sin is to set aside its guilt and can be a response to the first moment of repentance or even as an act of grace (Luke 11:4, 17:3). A sin forgiven is not erased from history or made into a good; a sin forgiven is a sin whose guilt has been removed from consideration. No longer is the guilt of the act held against its perpetrator, though the act is still real. That’s why we can forgive so much of the sin as was against ourselves but know it absurd to try and forgive on somebody else’s behalf.
Reconciliation is different from forgiveness. Forgiveness is indeed only the first step of reconciliation, for reconciliation is a renewal of relationship, a renewal of peace and love between two persons (1 Cor. 13:11). Yet a sin forgiven does not lead immediately to reconciliation in most cases. Why? Forgiveness has removed the guilt which obstructed the relationship, yes, and that is a necessary step in reconciliation. It has not, however, removed the fact of the sin. The one sinned against does not forget, when he forgives, and he should not. As “the tree is known by its fruit” (Matt. 12:33), so a man is known by his deeds. The man who sins against his brother, though the guilt of that sin is buried (buried, between Christians, in Christ, and for the unregenerate in the grave of their own judgement to come), by that sin he is known. If I sin against my brother, my brother is warranted to expect that I will so sin again.
Reconciliation, then, rests not just on forgiveness but on assurance that the sin committed has been fully repented (turned away from, the Biblical idea of repentance). Peace cannot live where one or both parties (for sin often comes from both sides, even if one side started it) are on perpetual guard against expected harm, and love struggles when the fruit of love, the works of the law (Gal. 5:13-14), is not in evidence.
How do we reach this assurance of repentance? If repentance is turning away, and a man is known by his fruit, then the answer is clear: we know a man has repented if the fruit of his life is a turning away from his former sin. Thus, the basis of this reconciliation is that “steadfast love and faithfulness” which today’s verse calls us to. It is love and faithfulness by the sinner and the one sinned against- from the sinner as a proof of repentance and as a free-will gift, from the sinner against as a hope for reconciliation, albeit tempered by just caution. In this, the word ‘steadfast’ is absolutely essential, for perseverance alone proves repentance. An inconstant repentance is no repentance at all.
Reconciliation between man and man is all very well, but to be quite honest it only imperfectly follows this pattern. Men are imperfect, after all, and so we must bear with a certain amount of imperfection, must have the humility to set aside small imperfection for the sake of the concord which should be between brothers. We must not seek out strife, in other words, and so we must be “slow to anger” (Prov. 16:32). The essence of this pattern is preserved, but the fullness of it between imperfect men cannot be expressed- not because the pattern is false but because we who are ourselves sinners have no weight to demand sinlessness from our fellows.
Reconciliation between God and man, on the other hand, is between the sinner and the sinless. The “steadfast love and faithfulness” therefore must be proportionally perfect. Nothing less will do. Unfortunately, we are sinful people; our own love and faithfulness cannot suffice. It is imperfect, blemished. We cannot be reconciled with God of ourselves.
The steadfast love of the Lord, however, endures forever, as Psalm 136 leaves no doubt about. His love and His faithfulness (as per Psalm 117:2) are perpetual and perfect; they are the love of the infinite for the finite, the greatest beauty of that which is loved. This love and this faithfulness can bring reconciliation, and among the great gifts they bring we must number forgiveness, repentance, and a heart of love and faith towards Him.
By His love and His faithfulness, He forgives us our sins, having taken them upon Himself. As the words, “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life,” assure us, God will redeem all whom He has called, all who therefore call upon Him, and He will redeem them out of His everlasting love. As He promised in Isaiah 53, He takes our sins upon Himself, and so the guilt of them is set aside, buried with Christ (Rom. 6:1-5). Thus, the first step of reconciliation is made: forgiveness.
By His love and His faithfulness, He gives us hearts of repentance from sin. “I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh,” declares Ezekiel 36:26, and a heart of flesh we have been given by the faithful God, a heart which is tender and which turns compulsively, if imperfectly, to God. By His grace and through His love, we repent of the sins which we once loved. We repent, and this repentance is not merely of the thought or the heart but of the whole person, so that Paul speaks justly when he says, “You who were once slaves of sin have become obedient from the heart to the standard of teaching to which you were committed” (Rom. 6:17).
By His love and His faithfulness, finally, He gives us hearts which have that reconciling ‘steadfast love and faithfulness’ towards Him and towards our brothers. Thus Paul speaks in 1 Corinthians 13:8, saying, “Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.” When all things are fulfilled, he tells us, we shall still have this love and faith which reconcile us to God, “who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation” (2 Cor. 5:18-19).
Let us praise Him!
God bless.
Written by Colson Potter
Sanctuary Functional Medicine, under the direction of Dr Eric Potter, IFMCP MD, provides functional medicine services to Nashville, Middle Tennessee and beyond. We frequently treat patients from Kentucky, Alabama, Mississippi, Georgia, Ohio, Indiana, and more... offering the hope of healthier more abundant lives to those with chronic illness.
